I was bored. I was super duper bored. It was January 4th, and my new years resolution was to finish ALL my video games by today. Now that I have done that, I had no new things to play. All of the sudden, I got an e-mail on my phone. I opened it.
The e-mail had no words in the “from” bar at the top. The subject was “Get old bootleg SNES cartridges! Only in today’s e-auction!” Intrigued at the sound of new video games, I went to the e-auction.
The first few games I had no clue what they were, so I sort of got bored watching the screen. I was about to close the site, when I saw the text saying “Bootleg Super Mario World” pop up. I decided to get it, and won.
2 weeks later, I got the Super Mario World cartridge in the mail. I was, once again intrigued when I saw most of the label was torn off of the cartridge. The only letters not torn off were: M, U, R, D, E, and R. I immediately put all the letters together and tried to think of something. After a while, I came up with one word: MURDER.
Obviously, I still put in the cartridge, something I still regret to this day. Not that I can feel depressed anymore. After all, doesn't the word on the cartridge say it all? I was going to stop here, but I suppose I can tell you how my fate came to be.
After I put the cartridge in, the game started. Everything looked normal, except that the hills and the clouds had some hyper-realistic blood on them. I thought nothing of it. I opened the file selection, and there was a save file on the game already. The name of the file was…
SAVE FILE 1!
I bet you weren't expecting that.
Anyways, I loaded the file, and went to the level with the first yoshi in it. I was walking, and as you may expect, I have played super mario world some form or another, and I know that this wasn’t here. There was a small red hill, with a very dark red pipe on the top. The first thing somebody would think would be “Something in a video game can’t hurt me. It’s just a video game!” Those people can keep believing that.
At that time, I was a skeptic too. So I went down the pipe. I thought it would be some bootleg-glitch secret. But something was wrong when I was falling for around 30 seconds. When I hit the ground, Bowser was there watching me. I was seriously freaked, so I lunged for the power button. all of the sudden, text popped up on the screen saing “You wouldn’t want to do that, would you?” and the power button was deactivated.
Mario and Bowser were on screen, glaring straight at me. More text popped up saying “You want a suprise? Here!” And bowser pulled out a portal gun. He blasted the floor under me and then he blasted above the lava. You can probably figure out what happened next.
To this day, I am a boo, guarding Bowser Castle. My home is in the 9th room. If any explorer finds my diary, share my story with the world.
-Bowser Castle Boo #453