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Something horrible has happened to my brother.

He's been chanting in his bedroom, nonstop.

We tried to take him to a psychiatrist.

We tried drugging him.

We tried hypnotizing him. (It didn't seem to be strong enough...)

Nothing worked.

Today, I went by his room to try to feed him, as usual.

Although my parents gave me strict orders not to turn him around, I decided to take one look at my brother any way.

What I saw could have given me nightmares.

He was staring into the distance, and his irises...

His irises were pulled dangerously tight.

I could barely even see his pupils anymore.

He opened his mouth.

"All glory to the Hip. No Toed."

"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO HIM?!" I screamed into the darkness of his room.

"WHOEVER YOU ARE, HIP OR WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU ARE? I MISS MY BROTHER, BRING HIM BACK!"

My brother ignored me, and refused his food, curling back into a fetal position in the dark corner of his room.

When I find this "Hip...No toed or Toes motherfucker," I'm going to rip this fuckers eyes ou-

ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD

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